Life in the Teen-zone

Looking back, there are a few things that I wish I had known back in High School. These are things that you often hear about, but never take seriously. More often than not, teenagers choose to believe that they are the first ones to go through the problems that arise in their lives. They ignore the advice of those older than them, believing that it no longer applies. I have kicked myself in the shins sooo many times for not following the suggestions and advice of others that have ‘been there’. Lately, however, I have come to appreciate the fact that I decided to make my own path through life. If I had listened to the advice and guidane of every that I met, i would have ended up following their path through life. Mistakes or not, I would much rather blaze my own path through the universe.

Here are a few tips for those of you that may actually be open to advice. These are things that may seem simple or elementary at first, but give them some thought. These tips will help you enter the mindset of Success that I am so heavily promoting. (Whoops, let it slip!)

1. Act like you own the place.

Self assurance is like a homing beacon to the mindless ‘followers’ out there. A man or woman that is sure of him/her self has their run of the place. The teenagers around you are, in essence, mindless zombies. They allow themselves to be influenced by the media, by their surroundings, and by their friends. Rather than becoming yet another mindless zombie, why be the one influencing them? I’m not saying that you necessarily have to be the captain of the football team or cheerleading squad (actually, that is one of the deterrents to success that I listed in the Success Junkies blog)… I am saying that no matter what crowd or ‘clique’ you are in, make sure that you are the one influencing what is going on.

From my personal High School experience, this works. I was involved in the Powerlifting/Weightlifting team at my High School for about three years. I competed every season, and did fairly well. Because I had been doing it for so long, I had the great opportunity to help coach my teammates. By helping them reach new levels, I was able to raise my own self-awareness and drive for success. This, in turn, made them respect me more. The better I did in competitions, the more I was able to help my teammates. It was a circle of success that helped us grow (physically, psychologically, etc) into better teammates and more success-minded individuals.

2. Diversify your portfolio.

Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket. This applies both to the stock market, and your life in general. Never limit yourself in what you do. Guidance counselor picking classes based on what you want to do in life? Don’t let them. Take a class that you never would typically have considered. Hate ‘artsy-fartsy’ things? Take Art Appreciation, and learn what exactly that ’stuff’ really means. Can’t sing a note for the life of you? Take a music class to teach you how to read that note. This will only help you in the future. You will meet all sorts of people. The more you know about their respective interests, the higher the chance is that they will respect you, and be interested in what you say or do.

Along with diversifying you knowledge-base, never let yourself get sucked into the trap of the ‘clique’ (click, cliq, etc). A ‘clique’ is a group of people with the same interests, mutual friends, or otherwise binding category. People that stick to a crowd just like themselves leads to social in breading. This is one of the reasons that close-minded racists and sexist bosses are so proliferate in society today. If you are considered a ‘geek’, make friends with some jocks and cheerleaders. Believe it or not, I have known quite a few cheerleaders that went ‘geek’ and never went back . If you are a goth, visit a country club with the preppy kids, and help them shock their parents into giving them a raise in their allowance. Try to meet people from every type of background, and do your best to find or make a common ground. By standing on the shoulders of 5 or 10 different groups, you will get much further up the social ladder than just getting pushed by your little group of 5 or 10 individuals.

3. Live it like you Stole It

Don’t stress yourself out. High School is fun. Trust me- the biggest problems that you will have (other than teen pregnancy and STD’s) are tiny compared to what is out there in the real world. Have a good time, and Live your life like you only have a few days left with yourself. Don’t ignore your grades or studies, by any means. Just don’t stay up until three A.M. every night trying to finish your AP or IB work. I had friends and acquaintances that got so burned out trying to excel in High School that they didn’t even finish college. I was one of them. I got sick of the stress of trying to perform based on someone else’s standards. I knew more about some of the topics I was being taught than my own teachers.. yet they were the ones grading me based on their own opinions!

School is important. Finish High School, do well in College, and you will get a good job, right? Eh, not necessarily. Of course, you have a higher chance for success. Then again, why are there so many people with Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees flipping burgers or waiting tables? They wasted 4-8 years of their life to learn things that are now doing Nothing to help them. Well, that last math class will help them calculate how much of a tip they just got stiffed on. Quit focusing on School. Focus on what you can get out of school. Learn things that will help you in life, instead of rememberizing just enough to pass the next test. Ask your teachers questions that mean something, instead of hypotheticals that will never help you in the workforce.

4. Start Young

Learn, Learn, and Learn Some More! After you learn something, practice it. Once you have read about how to start a business, go ahead and ask your parents to help you start one. Once you figured out how to program Facebook to text message you every time that you have a friend request.. do it! There is no way to succeed without making yourself susceptible to failure. It’s better to risk failure in the beginning than when you have the fate of a family resting on your shoulders. This is the time to come up with ideas before school. This is the moment to work up sample business proposals after you come home. Do your best to make use of the opportunities you have to make even bigger, brighter opportunities for the future.

5. Forget the Opposite Sex

(Or same sex, if you swing that way).. At this age, wanting girls or guys is just going to push them away. Unless you are so attractive you have people dropping at your feet, don’t stress about them. The boys and girls that you typically meet in High School are nothing like what they will be in the future. Many of the “hotties” usually turn out to be.. well, not so hot. In addition, it is in our nature to want what we can’t have. If a man or a woman that you may be interested in knows that you are, they may respond in turn. During the teen years, it is usually the opposite. Make them think you don’t care, and you’ll get their attention. Shower them with affection and pathetic attempts at flirtation, and you’ll get their scorn.

This is something else that applies to me directly. All throug school, I was the ‘nice guy’. I was the one that my girlfriends turned to for help. I knew all of the popular girls.. but also knew about how fragile and empty they really were. I would try, of course, to be the guy that they wanted.. But being nice just didn’t get me anywhere. The moment that I quit caring, I started getting more attention. For girls that would tell me all about their guy problems, I was becoming their guy problem. This is actually about the time that I met my wife-to-be. She was the only one that was able to turn my head once again, and man am I happy she did. Anyways, the moral of this short-story is that if you are unaccessible, you will be desired. Give it a try, and when it doesn’t work, keep waiting. Trust me, it never works on the first day.

In Summation

Good Luck, and Keep On Truckin’! Once again, Have Fun during your school years. Meet new people, learn new things, and abstain from sex until you are older. (Had to add that to appeal to the parents). Seriously though, Live Life, but don’t make mistakes that can affect the rest of your life. Don’t make babies. Don’t do drugs, and most of all — Don’t let anyone tell you who you are or who you are going to be.